


Tobacco Smoke

by SabineElectricHeart (TheLifeAndLiesOfFerns)



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Cigarettes, F/M, Self-Hatred, Sex, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-03
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-12 06:54:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29880753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLifeAndLiesOfFerns/pseuds/SabineElectricHeart
Summary: He always said he hated the way they smelled. Hated the way they looked. Hated the burn he would get in the back of his throat with a dry mouth. Alas, he loved what they did.
Relationships: Jeritza von Hrym/My Unit | Byleth
Kudos: 1





	Tobacco Smoke

It was all about the sex.

It ever was and ever will be, she would do well to remember that. She would do well if she avoids romanticizing their situation too much, as neither party is really wanting or prepared for something else.

That is what she told herself, anyway. It was all just for the sex, the opportunity to escape reality for a little while, a warm body to hold onto when the world seemed too cold to bear, when the young and innocent fell down as flies on the flame smoke of village hovels. It was not supposed to be this way, and she was not supposed to be this way, so she held onto whatever she could grab.

_You can lie to whoever you want, about whatever you want, but never attempt to deceive yourself._

The nights they spent together were so very wrong. The way they met in some dark corner of the ruined monastery and the way their muffled groans that filled the empty halls and courtyards echoed the true deceit that they were showing the world.

However, they did not care. This, for the moment, was their own particular world, and they were not open to visitors.

Fucking, sex, or better yet, making love, it was all a lie. It was all an escape. There was no love in their carnal act, only need and want, give and take. It was a jaded act by two jaded youths, forced to grow up before their time. To witness horrors none should ever.

It was only sex. Nothing more.

They never said more than a few words during their time together, less when they were around their allies and their sovereign. They were laconic, cold people, and in any capacity, there were no need for words. The feel of each other was all it really took. She set him over the edge and he brought her back in, there was no time for polite conversation.

All the hurt in the world was gone, for the moments that turned into minutes they escaped something far bigger than themselves. They did it out of defiance, out of loneliness, maybe even out of hate, but it was theirs, and no one and nothing could take it away.

Neither were afraid of death. It faced them every day and will continue to until they could not outrun it any longer, probably on some desolate battlefield on the slopes of their country. Some days they stopped running and waiting for death to catch up, but they could not trick it. Death only took the unwilling, but there were ways to get around that too.

Afterwards he always lit up a cigarette. She always stared, transfixed as she watched it burn.

He always said he hated the way they smelled. Hated the way they looked. Hated the burn he would get in the back of his throat with a dry mouth. Alas, he loved what they did.

They were a slow suicide.


End file.
